A Mess, Nonetheless

Whether you're someone who always wants to be right, or you're in a relationship with a person who does, you might want to listen. Rachel shares vulnerably her long-lasting struggle with this issue and Melissa reveals how challenging it was to be in a relationship with her as a result. They talk about tools to pick up and verses to cling to, no matter which side of the issue you land on. 
Show Notes:
Verses:
Romans 12:2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
Galatians 6:9 And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.
Prov 16:9 The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.
Prov 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
1 Chronicles 16:11 Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!
Challenge: Be willing to admit you need to be right all the time, and share it with someone you trust.

Are you someone who struggles with the idea of missing out? With wanting to be included in everything and feeling bad when you aren't? You are not alone! Miss and Rachel have been there, and at times still are. They talk about their experiences, how they've battled it in their minds and how we can use the Bible as our greatest tool against it.
 
Show Notes:
Vereses:
Psalm 27:10 - Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close.
Phil 4:8  Brothers and sisters, continue to think about what is good and worthy of praise. Think about what is true and honorable and right and pure and beautiful and respected.
The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Deut 31:8
Affirmations:
I say (or have said) I am unlovable, but God says I am forever loved.
“And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38-39).
I have been rejected, but God says I am His!
“Do not fear. I have redeemed you. I have summoned you. You are mine” (Isaiah 43:1).
I say I am alone, but God says He is always with me.
“…Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go” (Joshua 1:9)
Challenge: When you have feelings of fomo, loneliness, or rejection, ask yourself, “What am I believing, and what does God say about me?”

Who doesn't struggle with their body from time to time? Very few women haven't had to wrestle with it in one season or another. For many of us, it’s a constant thorn in our side. Miss and Rach chat with good friend, CJ Bartels as they talk about how God has been bringing them freedom in this area. They hope you're encouraged and begin seeing your body in a whole new light!
 
Show Notes:
Affirmations:
Affirmation: I set my mind and heart on things above and not on earthly things - and not on myself or my physical body. Colossians 3:1
Affirmation: God doesn’t look at my outward appearance. So neither will I. He looks at my heart. So, then, will I. 1 Samuel 16:7
Verses:
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
Ephesians 2:10 For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
Genesis 1:26-27 Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness."
1 Samuel 16:7 For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.
‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭1‬:‭17‬-‭19‬ ‭ERV‬‬ I pray that God will open your minds to see his truth. Then you will know the hope that he has chosen us to have. You will know that the blessings God has promised his holy people are rich and glorious. And you will know that God’s power is very great for us who believe. It is the same as the mighty power.
Challenge: We challenge you to start being nice to yourself every day. Start saying positive thoughts in place of negative thoughts. - Melissa
Find yourself a “Melissa”. Somebody you can be honest with. - Cj
 

Doesn't rest sometimes feel like an elusive idea? Something that's always out of our grasp, or if we do grasp it, it's fleeting? Melissa and Rachel talk about what they've learned regarding rest, what the Bible says about it, and how to build it into a busy and full life. 
Show Notes:
Verses
Matthew 11:28-30 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
Exodus 33:14 And he said, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”
Mark 6:31And he said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.” For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat.
Psalm 4:8 In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.
Challenge Make a plan for the next week to rest, whatever kind of rest you think you would need.

Have you ever felt the need to hide your imperfections, or mask the ways you don't get things right? Melissa and Rachel discuss the ways that they get things wrong, and it has blessed others when they've shared it. They also talk about how much it's encouraged them to see other people not be so perfect. They talk about what the Bible says on the topic and how we can learn from it.
Show Notes:
Verses: Phil 3:12-14 I don’t mean that I am exactly what God wants me to be. I have not yet reached that goal. But I continue trying to reach it and make it mine. That’s what Christ Jesus wants me to do. It is the reason he made me his. Brothers and sisters, I know that I still have a long way to go. But there is one thing I do: I forget what is in the past and try as hard as I can to reach the goal before me. I keep running hard toward the finish line to get the prize that is mine because God has called me through Christ Jesus to life up there in heaven.
Ecc 7:20 Surely there is no one on earth who always does good and never sins. But wisdom can make one person stronger than ten leaders in a city.
Galatians 6:2 Help each other with your troubles. When you do this, you are obeying the law of Christ.
Phil 2: 3-4 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.
James 5:16 So always tell each other the wrong things you have done. Then pray for each other. Do this so that God can heal you. Anyone who lives the way God wants can pray, and great things will happen.
Affirmation: Pretend perfection puts up real walls.
Challenge: Ask yourself, what harm can come from sharing our shortcomings with others? And how might doing so actually encourage those around me?

Are you someone who struggles to say "no"? Or someone who regularly feels like they don't have a true say over their life because they're always at the mercy of other people’s wishes? Perhaps that isn't you, but you could use a refresh on why boundaries are Biblical and healthy. Either way, this episode is for you! Miss and Rach share their examples of healthy boundaries and draw comparisons to the life of Jesus to explain why it's so important to have healthy boundaries in life.
 
Show notes:
Examples of Jesus setting boundaries:
He separated himself regularly from people to be alone with God.
He would sometimes take just a small group with him to retreat. 
Jesus was proactive in consistently investing in his time with God, which gave him energy and focus.
Jesus often didn’t do what people wanted him to do.
Food was often on his mind.
When he helped people, he expected them to do their part, he didn’t just give them what they wanted. 
He took naps.
He didn’t give in to the manipulation of the religious leaders.
He called out inappropriate behavior.
 
Challenge: Spend time thinking about an area or two that you know overdose you regularly. How might some boundaries make it easier for you?
 

Does it grate against you a little bit — the idea of another person calling you out in an area you might need to grow? Do your defenses rise when it happens? This is definitely the episode for you. It never feels good to be challenged in an area we might be blind to in life, but there is a lot of growth and freedom to be had on the other side. We hope you’ll listen and find your own growth in this area. 
Show notes:
Verses:
Galatians 1:6 Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted
Prov 27:17 Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.
James 5:16 Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.
James 5:19-20 My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.
Challenge: 1. Find at least one person you feel safe with, give them permission to challenge you. 2. Ask yourself regularly, “Is it possible that I am wrong in this?”

Is it sometimes easy to dread spending time with people during the holidays, even if you also love them? Do you ever find yourself getting stressed over the idea of being with certain people, or maybe reliving past hurts and frustrations in your mind? Do you "just know" certain things are going to happen again? Melissa and Rachel have been there and are working on not staying there. They share the ways they've moved beyond their frustrations with other people and what the Bible says about it. Don't skip this episode before you spend time with people this holiday season, we are sure you'll get something out of it!
Show notes:
Vereses:
1 Peter 3:8 Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.
Romans 14:19 So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.
Romans 12:16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight.
Colossians 3:14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.
Luke 6:35 But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return… 
‭‭Galatians‬ ‭1‬:‭10‬ Now do you think I am trying to make people accept me? No, God is the one I am trying to please. Am I trying to please people? If I wanted to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.
 
Quote: “Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.” ― Alexander Pope
Challenge: What has caused you stress in the past during the holidays? What could you step away from this year? Also, how can you lay down expectations this holiday season, and step into expectancy?
 

What do we do when it feels like things never go our way, and we are constantly disappointed? Especially when it seems like everyone around you has the very thing you want. Rachel and Melissa talk about their experiences with disappointment and how "fake it till you make it" isn't a healthy life-long coping strategy. They share the ways they've turned to Jesus and had to fight their own stinky attitudes in seeking heart transformations. 
 
Show notes:
 
Verses:
Ecclesiastes 3:1 “There is a right time for everything, and everything on earth will happen at the right time.”
 
Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust the Lord completely, and don’t depend on your own knowledge. With every step you take, think about what he wants, and he will help you go the right way.”
 
Phillipians 2:5 “In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus.”
 
Romans 12:2b “Let God change you inside with a new way of thinking. Then you will be able to understand and accept what God wants for you. You will be able to know what is good and pleasing to him and what is perfect.”
 
Philippians 2:14“Do everything without complaining or arguing.”
 
1 Peter 1:8-9 “Gladness not be based on circumstances.”
 
James 1:2-3 “Consider it joy to face trials because we know testing our faith produces perseverance.”
Challenge:
When things don’t go our way, put blinders on and look to Jesus. Ask Him to remove anger and bitterness. Ask him how you need to be transformed.

Have you ever been having a great time and suddenly a friend gets weird, out of nowhere? Or worse, you do and you're not even sure why! Melissa and Rachel talk about their experiences with these "triggering" moments and how God has used them to challenge and shape their course moving forward. And where they've landed for the health of relationships and personal growth.
Show notes:
Verses:
Jeremiah 17:9 "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?"
 
Psalm 139: 4-7 
"Lord, you know what I want to say, even before the words leave my mouth. You are all around me—in front of me and behind me. I feel your hand on my shoulder. I am amazed at what you know; It is too much for me to understand. Your Spirit is everywhere I go. I cannot escape your presence."
Psalm 139:23-24 "God, examine me and know my mind. Test me and know all my worries. Make sure that I am not going the wrong way. Lead me on the path that has always been right."
 
Romans 8:27 "And He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God."
1 Chronicles 28:9 “As for you, my son Solomon, know the God of your father, and serve Him with a whole heart and a willing mind; for the Lord searches all hearts, and understands every intent of the thoughts."
Affirmation:
I can ask the Holy Spirit to direct my thoughts and actions. I can ask Him to search my heart. 
Challenge: When you feel yourself being weird, just call it like it is. Telling people what's going on can save a lot of heartache in relationships.